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Homeland Security
By
R.G. Larsen
It was after the third consecutive inauguration of George W. Bush, after the conservative rallies that exploded into violence against the Hollywood movie and television industries, but before travel anywhere in the states required the traveler to possess a valid federal identification card that the registered letter from Homeland Security came to Jonah Bernstein:
“It has come to our attention that you are eminently qualified in your field. Although budgetary restraints have adversely affected many colleges and universities, professors who can teach critical thinking skills are always in demand. Our agency has temporary openings for qualified personnel to conduct seminars in universities across our nation for completion of research studies begun before recent department consolidations. Some travel is required. Interested candidates are encouraged to fill in the attached application and return it immediately.”
Jonah examined his bank balance and shuddered. Did he have much choice? He had had obligated himself by purchasing expensive clothes and a fine sports car. Having the United States Constitution amended to remove the two-term restriction for president without serious opposition bothered Jonah. Cabinet positions of Health and Human Services, Education, Housing and Urban Development, and Veterans Affairs were placed under the ominous umbrella of Homeland Security, whose application form he now pondered. He attributed his own dismissal as a temporary professor not to budget restraints but to events following the closing of the U.S. border with Mexico by the Army. He had denounced this by saying, “There are no more wetbacks because they are all floating face down in the Rio Grande, commemorating one of America’s own Punic Wars.” Now without other alternatives, he applied for the Homeland Security position.
“Tell me, Mr. Bernstein, what do you know of the practice referred to as
Equilibria?” asked the Homeland Security interviewer.
“Not much, in fact, nothing.”
“Let me explain. Students are exposed to a prevailing viewpoint in one corner of a classroom while in an opposite corner they are given a contrary viewpoint. They then move to a third corner where they must reconcile divergent views to achieve synthesis or equilibrium. Once they believe they have achieved this, they are conducted to a fourth corner where their fundamental premises are challenged and their balance upset. Did they ask the right questions initially? Are there other possible avenues for inquiry that they either neglected or were unable to see through cultural bias?”
“Fascinating, I love the concept, but how can one do this in a typical college classroom?” asked Jonah.
“One can’t. Seminars become corners for two weeks as visiting professors travel from school-to-school. We have found that having the same person try to present opposite views just isn’t effective.”
“Yes, I can understand that.”
“Do you have an interest in taking part in this process?”
“Yes,” he replied and shortly found a contract in front of him. Rigorous training sessions followed, during which he had to argue convincingly that wealthy southern landowners did not support slavery and that the Japanese rape of Nanking was not one of the worst atrocities in recent history. He was given high marks for both exercises.
When his assignment came, its arrival shocked him. He must argue that Hitler’s extermination of Jews didn’t take place as reported and that some killing was justified. He hurried to discuss this with his trainer.
“Having second thoughts Mr. Bernstein?”
“Wondering how I am going to pull this together. How can I do this without materials.”
“We anticipated that. Here are two textbooks to support controversial arguments and a collection of carefully edited materials in the form of essays that may help. We will have sufficient copies in place at the college bookstores.” Jonah glanced at several essays.
“Where on earth did you find these?”
“We raided the offices of a group in Idaho that was tax delinquent and found these warehoused in their cellar.”
“What group was that?”
“The Aryan Brotherhood,” explained his section chief.
“My God!” exclaimed Jonah.
“We have removed any references to that group and created bogus periodical references.” Jonah read one of the textbook chapters while his chief watched.
“Hitler didn’t order Jews into concentration camps?” Jonah questioned.
“It is on record that some went willingly to accompany loved ones.”
“And those who didn’t go willingly?”
“During wartime many groups are isolated as a security precaution. We did it when we sent Japanese-Americans to Manzanar in WW II.”
“The wholesale deaths and incinerations?”
“Infectious disease was rampant. What do you do when festering bodies threaten to affect the civilian populace? You burn them.”
“But they were gassed first.”
“A humane consideration, one could argue.”
“I’m going to have trouble pulling this off.”
“Perhaps, but you might argue that Hitler was merely imitating practices well established by Stalin in the years leading up to the war. Why hold Germany more to blame than our wartime ally, the Soviet Union? What of the genocide practiced by the Japanese? What of the American bombing of Hiroshima and Nagasaki? Did we not sacrifice civilian populations for military ends? There was the firebombing of Tokyo and Dresden and Hamburg that may have destroyed a hundred thousand civilians each time. Our hands are not clean. Are you still willing to teach the seminars?”
“I suppose so, but I’d like to be present when my students finally resolve these different points of view.”
“That will be difficult. You will be initiating your seminars in one geographic area while other professors are completing theirs in schools you have passed through. I assure you that you will receive the overall student results on essay questions that you will help design.”
“What of my professional reputation as I pretend to support views no reasonable person would hold?”
“It is a game, an exercise. Students understand this and so do faculties.”
The seminars were entertaining for Jonah who could argue with the best of minds. Most students loved him, even if a few angrily challenged him in class. He lived out of two large suitcases, was introduced as Doctor Professor Bernstein, and afforded full faculty privileges as he hopscotched across the country. He hardly had time to spend his ample paychecks as his travel, meals, and much of his entertainment were underwritten. The semester ended much too soon. Homeland Security scheduled a meeting for early July to review program effectiveness. He went with great anticipation.
“Good afternoon, Mr. Bernstein, please have a seat.” He was surprised to see several high-ranking department people present and security guards, outside the door.
“Your teaching was extremely effective. A significant number of those you instructed listed teaching as their major goal. Would you like to see some results?” Stacks of “blue books”” were piled next to his desk.
“Yes thank you,” replied Jonah. He opened one of the blue books. The essay questions were, “What is your assessment of political means used by the Nazi regime against minorities” and “Are any of the same elements evident in political measures used today? Explain.” He read, silently, one booklet after another, and then gasped. “This is atrocious! Where are the contrasting views? They condone and accept genocide and population relocation. They see it as a viable alternative. Is this a joke?” he asked.
“There were no other professors or other viewpoints, Mr. Bernstein, just yours, unfortunately. You see, we ran short of funding and were not allowed to bring in the other instructors as planned,” explained his chief.
“That’s preposterous,” answered Jonah. “I’m not going to stand for this. No one has the right to manipulate students this way. I will not allow my name to be associated with this nonsense.”
“I believe your name already is associated with it.”
“Not after I go to the press.”
“I do not believe that would be wise, Mr. Bernstein. You realize that by contract all of your notes and materials belong to us. We already have them in our possession, and we have videotapes of your presentations. Your refutation will not be believed.”
“I’ll fight you on this. Why are you doing this? What is the point of it all?” asked Jonah.
“We educate as well as protect the citizenry. As you must know, the border situation with Mexico is becoming tense. Many Americans living in Mexico are suffering recriminations; additionally, the Mexican government has been unable or unwilling to stop violence and homegrown militias along its northern border. We may have to go in. If we do, there will certainly be problems among large Latino populations in our major cities. Our people must be prepared for what may happen.”
“We are going to invade Mexico?” gasped Jonah.
“Americans living there must be protected even if they are not physically within our borders, Mr. Bernstein, while here in the Unites States we must take steps to assure that no citizen is subjected to the kind of madness that erupted years ago in Detroit and Watts.
“My God, you are talking invasion and population control. This is the Sudetenland and Poland all over again.”
“We understand your concern, Mr. Bernstein, but we need to prepare the general public for Draconian measures in case things go poorly.” We do feel badly that the original educational exercise could not be implemented as planned. We also understand your disappointment, and are prepared to offer you a full professorship at a University outside the United States funded through our State Department. We are doing this despite the fact that you did not complete all of the appearances as outlined in your contract with our agency.”
“I beg your pardon! What are you talking about?”
“You never made appearances at two of the schools as planned.”
“I was sick one week and had a medical appointment on another date.”
“Yes, but you didn’t fulfill the terms of your contract. There was no provision for missed duties. You had a short vacation in the spring, during which time you could have made up those dates but chose not to do so.”
“I don’t believe this. Go to hell!”
“You were paid a set fee for the entire package and there was no provision for missed dates. We can request that all monies be returned and freeze your assets as a guarantee; moreover, the air fares, rental cars, and meals can be charged back to you at their first class rates. Would you like to know more about the position we are offering? With it goes a certification of completion for the seminars concluded.”
Jonah wrung his hands. “What is the position, more Nazi nonsense? Perhaps you would like me to defend Saddam Hussein?”
“Simply teaching world history using a curriculum sanctioned by an international panel of experts. You will have considerable freedom within the framework. You may indulge in any of your personally held biases or stray from the curriculum at your peril.”
Jonah shrugged, saw little room to maneuver, and got a rein on his temper. His chief continued, “You were of great service to us, but your continued presence here might prove awkward, perhaps embarrassing to the administration. Wasn’t it Arthur Schlessinger who explained that who controls the past controls the future and who controls the present controls the past? Something like that.”
“He was quoting George Orwell’s 1984,”corrected Jonah.
“We control the present, Mr. Bernstein.”
“What do you mean stray from the curriculum at my peril? Where is the position and what does it pay?”
“The pay will be the same as you made here, mostly the same perks except no car will be provided. Additionally, the money you earn will not be subject to U.S. taxes considering the length of your stay. You will be required to sign a three year contract.”
“What did you mean by straying from the curriculum at my peril?” asked Jonah.
“Being an American and having the name Bernstein makes it a bad idea to stray too far from the American University in Beirut. Here is the contract. You may take as much time as you need this morning to look it over, but you will need to make a final decision before you leave this room. We can arrange to give you copies of your videotaped lectures if you believe that will make your assimilation easier?”
Copyright © 2006 R. G. Larsen
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